How to Fix it - Kids in Today's Youth Culture
Writer Author Sylvia Huffnagle
Christian Article
:
Children
- Fiction No
How Far Should Christian Parents Let Their Kids Go in Today's Youth Culture
Many people write books and are then interviewed as having some answers to some of life’s big problems like “How far do you let your Christian kids go into today’s youth culture?” Those of us who are crying out to God for answers to whatever dilemma the book or article covers come to attention. Some of us grab a pencil and paper, others are looking for paper or pencil as the interview starts.
The question is asked by the interviewer--in this case: “So, how far do you let your Christian kids go into today’s youth culture?”
We’re (us who really want to know) are sitting on the edge of our seat, ready to jot down good advice. The author says, “Well, first you have to establish a good relationship with the child or children.”
Interviewer: “How do we do that? What do we have to do?”
Author: “Listen to them and understand where they are coming from.”
Problem #1: Many kids don’t know how to communicate with adults or just can’t communicate their thoughts and feelings.
Problem #2: A lot of what young people and kids think and believe today is off the wall. By that I mean, it is not anything like the wisdom of God revealed in Proverbs, among other places. Many who have been well raised find it impossible to listen to kids very long without chomping at the bit to teach and correct.
I’m saying, how do you establish a good relationship with those who know very little true facts, but think they know what they are talking about and do not want to hear from those who do not agree with today’s ideas? This is a sincere question. I feel that I have tried to the max to establish a good relationship with the kids and I do not feel that I have accomplished it, so tell me what I have to do, please!
Author: Well, you have to spend time with the kids, you know sort of hang with them. Enter into what they are doing. Lighten up and enjoy being a naive, silly kid again.
Problem #1: Perhaps the parent--usually it’s just one parent that is working at these things--has already tried to establish a relationship with the child and all they get is lip and pouts.
Or the parent or parents don’t know how relate to children’s interests and tastes. Maybe their upbringing was too different from today’s world and ways for them to be able to enter into their children’s world. Maybe they were taught not to do a lot of things that are acceptable for kids to do today. Such as farting and burping and laughing with them about it when in their day it was a punishable act to deliberately do these things in public or to laugh about it.
Moving on, the parent’s personality may not allow them to enjoy childish things with their kids. Also it may take many years to establish the relationship needed to get the child to listen to and accept the parent’s explanation and be willing to co-operate. That was only step one.
This article started out to bring up the point that a lot of articles and interviews that are touted as being the answer to people’s problems are not the answer at all, because the one who needs answers can’t do one, two, or three. Therefore the author’s solution is only the solution for a very few select people.
Now that I’ve brought up the question of how far do we let kids go with today’s worldly youth culture? You have to decide, but here’s what God says about how we are to deal with children:
Deut:11:16-20: Take heed to yourselves, that your heart be not deceived, and ye turn aside, and serve other gods, and worship them; 17: And then the LORD's wrath be kindled against you, and he shut up the heaven, that there be no rain, and that the land yield not her fruit; and lest ye perish quickly from off the good land which the LORD giveth you. 18: Therefore shall ye lay up these my words in your heart and in your soul, and bind them for a sign upon your hand, that they may be as frontlets between your eyes. 19: And ye shall teach them your children, speaking of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. 20: And thou shalt write them upon the door posts of thine house, and upon thy gates:
Prov:4:1: Hear, ye children, the instruction of a father, and attend to know understanding.
Prov:5:7: Hear me now therefore, O ye children, and depart not from the words of my mouth.
Prov:7:24: Hearken unto me now therefore, O ye children, and attend to the words of my mouth.
Prov:20:11: Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right.
Prov:22:6: Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
Prov:22:15: Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.
Prov:23:13: Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.
Prov:29:15: The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.
Some may think this is not the way to deal with children today. Then go ahead and try to do it the new way. Get down and play on their level. Don’t tell them how foolish their thinking is, according to God. Ignore the godly wisdom in Proverbs. Take a chance on today’s theories being more successful than God’s way.
Some may think Proverbs is a little harsh. God provided some tempering in the New Testament:
Eph:6:4: And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Col:3:21: Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.
1Thes:2:11: As ye know how we exhorted and comforted and charged every one of you, as a father doth his children,
That’s the way the Bible is. It lays things out in black and white and then balances it or tempers it so that those who walk by the Spirit of godly love can find the love balance.
So, after reading these scriptures, how far should Christian parents let their children enter into today’s culture? I can’t decide that for you. I can just give you biblical advise which I maintain is far better than today’s ways and tell you what I would do.
When I speak often to the children about God’s precepts and mandates, in obedience to Deut: 11, I would testify to His Fatherly love for all of us and make sure they “got it” that God was only teaching us how to win in life. I would see to it that they understood that the Bible is the child of God’s handbook--all that God tells us to do and all that He tells us to stay away from is merely the designer, the manufacturer telling us how to get the most out of the product. Or better yet a loving Father teaching his child how to live right and get the most out of life.
If, after the child or children have been made thoroughly familiar with God’s love and teaching, they still want to “stick their head in it” as the world is doing, I would tell them how far they could go--what they could read, watch, listen to and who they could hang out with. I would explain why they could go no farther into the world’s self-destruct mode. I would let them be exposes to a little of it and prep them to recognize the discrepancies between what the world teaches and believes and what the Bible teaches and true Christians believe.
I would take the stand that they would one day soon be making their own decisions, but for now, I was the one doing the training and protecting and in my house and we serve the Lord.
Sylvia Huffnagle
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